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• W1593205401 abstract "The Foreigner1 I know is an exploration into foreignness through an autobiographical poetic and visual narrative. It aims to signify the potency of personal encounters and the efficacy of laying bare that which is not easily perceived, that which is unbearable, and perhaps... secret. And so, it is predominantly through my eyes that I first encounter difference, otherness, foreignness. It is through my eyes I see the foreigner that does not know me and who is not able to recognise herself in me. But she is the one that lives within me and inhabits the impossible space of my non-being, of living within and of living without, of exiting to that which I cannot bear to see. Julia Kristeva asks 'Who is the foreigner? The one who does not belong to the group, who is not 'one of them,' the other?'2 The foreigner could be the one that comes from elsewhere, but distance alone is not what defines the foreigner. Paradoxically, she is the one caught on the one hand by what s/he is 'thought of in terms of political power and legal rights' and on the other within these very same political power and legal rights, 'religious fanatics... point to a new set of foreigners...who do not share...their faith.'3 In essence, once an individual is believed to have an identity within the imagined political community, the nation,4 this does not preclude them from becoming a foreigner. A fundamental difference such as a belief system or practice, identified by rivalling groups within the nation, can trigger the birth of a new foreigner. Kristeva says 'Henceforth the foreigner is neither a race or a nation.... Uncanny, foreignness is within us: we are our own foreigners, we are divided.'5 The image of the foreigner then is the opaque presence in a sea of illusionary sameness. The foreigner I know does not know me. Before the first encounter, I am her invention and she is mine. She is the freedom I yearn for, the pain in my past, the white page on which I will write my new history. I attempt this freedom through the abyss that positions her so far away from me - but I fail to see her anguish, and I fall. Her face bears both promise and threat and I am attracted to it. I approach her repeatedly so I may become part of her present, to accelerate it, to connect but she does not recognise herself in me and so I become the subject of her abjection, that which lives within and without. I admire her distance for I cannot bear my reserve and so I wander through vast silences carrying her terror and try to re-imagine the space where her face did not carry the burden of foreignness. Through her dislocation, I endure the relentless reminder that I am also a stranger in a strange land a land with a past which reinvents itself through her sheer presence. Death is always by her side waiting for justification. And so she continues to search for that moment when all rejections will be remembered as some form of rite of passage. Waiting to discover that all obstacles are nothing but character building exercises which all have to endure. Always ready to learn, as if learning is all that is needed, she postpones the realisation that she will never be part of it or worse, that her children with their skin and their hair, will never be part of it. Inappropriateness haunts her and so she imagines that dreams belong to some place else - the place left behind in all its pathetic nostalgic glory. Return, no longer possible, she is possessed with assimilation and manufactures a mask to shield me from the scars. I offend her often, she then recoils and flees in order to reassemble herself for the next encounter. …" @default.
• W1593205401 created "2016-06-24" @default.
• W1593205401 creator A5022821904 @default.
• W1593205401 date "2005-01-01" @default.
• W1593205401 modified "2023-09-26" @default.
• W1593205401 title "The foreigner I know" @default.
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