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• W2004135995 abstract "202 British Journal of Community Nursing Vol 18, No 4 After the publication of the End-of-Life care (EoL) strategy, the Dying Matters Coalition emerged to help people talk about their own death and dying. One of the strategies was to dedicate a week in May as an awareness period, through which it is hoped people may find ways of discussing their own deaths and plan how and where they want the death to take place. The belief is that this may ensure a ‘good’ death for that person. Half way through the 10-year vision of the EoL care strategy, it is prudent to examine its key developments and impact on patients and carers particularly in the community. The community is of interest as most people (70% in a survey by Seymour (2010)) prefer to die at home. Some community nurses may not be in favour of talking openly about death and dying themselves, but they need to remain professional and not let personal beliefs get in the way of caring. They too will need support to talk about why they might feel uncomfortable talking about death. Community nurses will come across patients and families engaged in talking about death openly, so it is important they are aware of some of these activities and understand what purpose such activities may serve among their participants. For example, ‘death cafes’, which are based on the idea of people getting together to share experiences of dying; an idea imported from Switzerland to help organise open conversations about death. In Worcester, for example, there is grief gardening project, started by a local lady after her daughter’s death. The project offers bereavement support to others at the crucial time following a death. The idea is to verbalise feelings as a way of resolving grief. Some GPs are holding death planning sessions to support patients and families achieve a good death. These activities help those who have experienced death to share their feelings as a way of learning and maybe do things differently for their own death. When hardship is shared it is often halved and can only benefit the bereaved. Boundaries must be drawn on how far people are encouraged to engage in activities or the nature of the activities. Dying Matters has launched a writing competition to coincide with awareness week. There is sense to suggest that when people fail to talk openly about their dying experiences, for some, death can be a lonely and painful experience. But there have to be limits on how much open talking is done without reducing the whole death experience into a painful public story telling exercise. There may seem to be no problem with such creative initiatives, because it can be argued that people self-select to enter such competitions. However, every now and then one wonders whether the balance may be tipping the other way and death and dying might be converted into some jolly meaningless event, ignoring the sensitivity of emotions and thoughts the bereaved might be going through. Normally, it is after this ‘party’ has ended that the bereaved seriously reflect on the event, and the impact on life without the deceased. It is not clear how some bereaved people may feel about entering a competition and the possibility of making money by writing creatively about their experiences. My concern is that such competitions may detract from the seriousness of death by enticing the bereaved to put pen to paper with the possibility of monetary gain used as a carrot. Is it right that people are asked to recapture the experiences that may have been in themselves painful and write them down for a competition? Even if the bereaved decide not to enter the competition, the advert itself could have made them consider the possibility, and it is a crucial time for community nurses to be able to ‘pick up the pieces’ and be supportive to these families or friends. While initiatives may seem helpful, community nurses need to be aware of what the bereaved might be thinking after the ‘party’ is over. Could the party have acted as a useful distraction at the time, and may feel twice as bad afterwards? Talking openly about death is a welcome idea which ensures dying people can say how and where they wish to be cared for and die. What is also needed is further training and education for health professionals on how to handle such openness as it may be damaging to psychological adjustment people go through during dying and death. The old adage to do everything in moderation should be applied here so dying and death are afforded respect and dignity. The danger of over-exposure to death could lead to desensitisation, rendering dying meaningless, which in turn could make life meaningless as well. BJCN" @default.
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• W2004135995 title "Dying matters awareness week: refocusing on sensitivities of dying" @default.
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• W2004135995 doi "https://doi.org/10.12968/bjcn.2013.18.4.202" @default.
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