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• W2052204443 abstract "I was going over my notes for this editorial letter when a soft clicking noise alerted me to a new email. ‘‘I was wondering whether you can help me,’’ inquired a man. ‘‘I think I am suffering from depression, and it affects my relationship with my partner.’’ No further information was given. Before responding, I reflected on this typical and, on the face of it, simple request for therapy. I started seeing it in light of the first two articles for this issue of the Transactional Analysis Journal, which I had just read. This man came with a self-imposed diagnosis and was aware that somehow his structural problem had relational implications. He put the responsibility within himself; it was he who ‘‘had depression.’’ I didn’t yet know whether his partner was male or female, whether that relationship was the only one affected, or whether the client was 18 or 80 years old. I asked myself how I would work with him if we decided to proceed. How much would I be aware of the client’s ever-shifting ego states, from moment to moment, as well as my own? To what extent would he be willing to look at our relationship and at how depression might affect it? How did he view depression? Was it ‘‘the curse of the strong’’ (Cantopher, 2003) and the result of depleted serotonin supplies caused by stress hormones? And, if so, why was he stressed? Where should I focus first? The client implicitly wanted to be relieved of a condition he termed ‘‘depression,’’ and he assumed that his relationship with his partner would improve as a result. This was a legitimate request. Pull the splinter out, don’t prolong the agony, as in Berne’s (1971, p. 12) metaphor. The relationship that needed attention was the one with his partner, not with anyone else, at least not as far as the potential client told me. I found myself wondering if it is useful to introduce the importance of the therapeutic relationship from the beginning of any therapeutic work. Would it surprise my potential client to do so, would he welcome the idea, or would it put him off? It is ethical for a relational therapist to state how he or she works? I say things such as, ‘‘You might find that, on occasion, what happens ‘out there’ also has a bearing on what happens ‘in here,’ and in our contact things will be played out, albeit in slightly different fashion, that affect you elsewhere.’’ Most people simply nod, without inquiring further, but it is a useful thing to be able to refer back to if and when we run into enactments. But is everything relational? Are there states of (body)mind that are not based on a relational experience? As Cornell (2012) wrote, ‘‘We do not live our lives in perpetual, intersubjective matrices’’ (p. 255). Martin’s Buber’s (1962, p. 97) assertion ‘‘der Mensch wird am Du zum Ich’’ is virtually impossible to translate and stems from a work preceding the much loved I and Thou (Buber, 1937/2010). The only official translation I have come across is a fairly clumsy one:" @default.
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• W2052204443 title "Letter from the Coeditor" @default.
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• W2052204443 doi "https://doi.org/10.1177/0362153713509957" @default.
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