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• W229720926 abstract "This is based on a master's thesis written for Regis University. complete thesis may read at www.aphroweb.net. Chapter 1 INTRODUCTION Monogamy is the assumed standard for relationships in our culture. A married person who has sex outside the marriage is assumed to cheating, to unfaithful. same standard is applied to anyone in a committed relationship. Yet are people who have agreed that they will not sexually exclusive, and who have sex with others with the full consent of their partner. One way of doing this has been called (often shortened within the polyamorous community to poly). About Polyamory Definition Polyamory has been defined by White (2004, p. 17) as Living by the principle that it is possible to love more than one person at a time without deception or Furthermore, she pointed out that most of the definitions of polyamory found on the Internet utilize words like ethical, responsible, honorable, open, honest, intentional, and principled (p 20). This is in contrast to the concept generally held in our culture that having a sexual partner in addition to your spouse is a betrayal. Couples who are polyamorous have made a conscious decision to have other partners while maintaining their connection and commitment to their original partner. This is a mutual agreement, not a betrayal. Note that definitions for various words and phrases related to polyamory can found at www.polyamorysociety.org/language.html. Lack of Research on Polyamory There has been very little academic research on polyamory. Why is this so? Rubin (2001) hypothesized that Swinging, group marriages, and communes [and polyamory] may remain on the periphery of study and tolerance they threaten the cultural image of what marriage is supposed to be (p. 724). Elisabeth Sheff, who started research for her Ph.D. in sociology in the late 1990s, received some encouragement because it was an area that had not been developed yet and it is good to a groundbreaker, but also discouragement, it is a freaky topic and she could marginalized of the topic (personal communication, January 19, 2005). Many social scientists support the questioning mindset, the idea that there is nothing that should not doubted. Everything must unceasingly examined (Lofland and Lofland, 1995, p. 154). In spite of this, even an eminent psychologist like Albert Ellis (2003), who was writing about sex even before Kinsey, has had his writings that question our society's attitudes towards sexuality censored, modified without his permission, and omitted from compilations of symposia at which he presented. Who therefore will take the risk of researching some part of this topic of polyamory which questions the cultural standard for sexual behavior? People who have a personal interest in the subject (e.g. Barker, 2005; Sheff, 2004; Wolfe, 2003). Questioning Monogamy Most people do not think about monogamy. It is simply a given. main issue for therapists around monogamy is dealing with its failure, i.e. infidelity. question of whether or not monogamy is a choice that people want to make is not generally discussed. Some people, however, have thought about it, they have questioned it, they have discussed it with their partner, and have chosen to live life a different way. Our society has used laws and social pressure to encourage married couples to stay together in spite of their differences, but this clearly has not been working very well in recent years. What else besides legal sanctions provides the glue that keeps marriages together? In a discussion of cohesion in multilateral (group) marriages, Constantine and Constantine (1974) noted the need for a mechanism to encourage internal problem-solving rather than allowing needs to satisfied externally. They commented, The fidelity ethic in a monogamous marriage serves as such a mechanism to keep the husband and wife solving problems in their relationship. …" @default.
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• W229720926 date "2005-01-01" @default.
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• W229720926 title "Commitment in Polyamory" @default.
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