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• W335866915 abstract "I was in no condition to make $6,000 worth of decisions. -Surviving widow He was put away had-and we had the money! -Distraught daughter It was a beautiful funeral in every way. -Surviving widow Families making decisions about after the death of a family member find themselves with more options than ever. The increase in options can bring flexibility, and it can bring frustration. The extra choices can help the family to derive a sense of meaning from the process or can make a hard time even more difficult. Much depends on the circumstances surrounding the death (for example, anticipated versus sudden, socially acceptable versus stigmatized) and the decision maker's familiarity with final arrangements. This article presents practical ideas for gerontologists to enhance their ability to help clients through the labyrinth of decision making. With more than half of annual deaths occurring among people age 75 or older, basic familiarity with final-arrangement options and costs should be part of every gerontologist's tool kit. The term final arrangements means the collection of decisions made regarding body disposition, final ceremony, and memorialization. is used in a broad sense to mean the people most affected by the death of the person, whether related by blood, marriage, partnership, or deep friendship. Pre-need plans mean pre-paid funeral insurance policies, generally sold by staff of a funeral home to cover the cost of most of the final expenses. Final arrangements that are not preneed are considered to be at-need, in that the person has just died. FINAL ARRANGEMENTS ARE UNIQUE When final-arrangement discussions and decisions take place among concerned parties prior to the death, time and emotion are on the side of the decision makers. If these decisions are made after the death, the decision maker can be at a disadvantage. The process of making the financial arrangements is different from most other consumer purchases because of the purchaser's emotional state and likely lack of experience in this area. The list on page 32 shows factors that can complicate final-arrangement decisions after the death occurs. Gerontologists should make special outreach efforts to members of vulnerable communities, including those for whom English is a second language, people living in poverty, or people stigmatized because of ethnicity, religious beliefs, or sexual orientation. These groups of people may face additional challenges compounding those listed here. The factors listed are self-explanatory with the exception of uncertainty. Some people are not sure what is considered socially appropriate behavior when it comes to final arrangements. Should one ask about options other than embalming? Can a family bring clothes from home for the deceased? Should one ask if there are any slightly damaged caskets at a reduced price? The etiquette questions can begin before the body reaches the funeral home. Most deaths occur in a hospital or a nursing home. Family members can request to remain with the body for minutes or hours. For some people, seeing and being with the decedent helps to clarify that a death has taken place and provides a time to say good-bye. Some family members do not know to ask or are embarrassed to ask for this time. Some people want to be alone with the body; others are uncomfortable being alone but would like to be part of a group. If unresolved, etiquette uncertainty can have implications that linger. An 80-year-old woman mentioned that ten years after her husband's death, she was still bothered that he was lying in his casket with his hair parted on the wrong side. At the time of his death, she hadn't felt it was her place to change the part. In another case, a 4o-year-old father wanted to remain at the graveside until Ms infant son's casket was buried. The cemetery staff said they would bury the casket after everyone left. …" @default.
• W335866915 created "2016-06-24" @default.
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• W335866915 date "2004-07-01" @default.
• W335866915 modified "2023-09-26" @default.
• W335866915 title "The Decision Labyrinth: Helping Families Find Their Way through Funeral Options" @default.
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