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• W4386565433 abstract "FigureFigureI was on my internal medicine rotation when a code blue was called in the emergency department. Full of adrenaline, I ran down the stairs and into the room to start chest compressions and run through ACLS algorithms. I had flashbacks to the time when I was a forensic autopsy technician. I remembered the autopsies of patients who sustained broken ribs and bruises while undergoing life-saving procedures. Unfortunately, similar to them, our patient could not be brought back. The room became silent. Beeping alarms, buzzing communication between team members, a leader shouting orders all stopped, and it was eerily quiet. The room emptied quickly as the patient's daughter was brought in. The nurses cleaned and covered the body. The daughter remained alone, in shock. I was in shock too. Despite being surrounded by death in my prior career, I had never seen life pass from a patient while actively fighting against death. But I had seen this before—I recognized the look of utter devastation on the daughter's face. I had been in this situation before. I was ready. Falling back on my prior lessons in the morgue, I placed a hand on her shoulder and made my presence known. A subtle suggestion that she was not alone in this. She was supported even if we did not know each other. We shared the quiet moment as she took her mother's hand in hers and wept. No words were exchanged for several minutes as the shock wore off, and I left her in the care of other family members who were just arriving. Work continued as normal. The physicians were accustomed to this, but the shock of the situation permeated my thoughts during the day. Images of her mother's face during chest compressions, the sounds in the room followed by a hallowed silence that seemed to infiltrate the entire emergency department. My second crash course, beyond grief, a lesson in resilience, emotional fortitude. I suppressed my feelings throughout the day so that I didn't make mistakes with other patients. I had to accept that my time to acknowledge these emotions would have to wait. Medical school courses are amazing in teaching us actions to take and ways to console patients, but the actual situation where emotions are raw is far different. I feel as though no amount of preparation will prepare students for their first crash course. When they're not expecting to learn, when they're not ready to be confronted by an emotionally challenging situation, is when the most learning is done. It encourages one to grow most as a person and develop resilience, a critical skill that we future emergency physicians can expect to utilize and hone throughout our careers, a skill that allows one to sit and be with someone in a crisis rather than letting him wade through grief alone. We're all human, and we all need support. I still think about the family from the morgue, about the patients in the oncology clinic, and about the daughter whose mother had died. I wasn't ready to experience any of these situations, and they are now forever a part of me. Each encounter hones my emotional strength and ability to console. I am eternally grateful to these people. Without them, I would not have learned to separate myself from the turmoil of a situation and provide support to those family members who need it most. They will live on through all my future patient interactions because they have prepared me in ways that no medical class could have." @default.
• W4386565433 created "2023-09-10" @default.
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• W4386565433 date "2019-06-12" @default.
• W4386565433 modified "2023-10-16" @default.
• W4386565433 title "Narrative Medicine" @default.
• W4386565433 doi "https://doi.org/10.1097/01.eem.0000559606.48714.da" @default.
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